1. I am blessed beyond belief to have loving, giving, funny, caring, accepting, and scrappy family and friends (I feel bad for anyone who has to go through the awkward adolescent years with an Anonymean in their life).
2. The claim that pizza is a vegetable-based food is crap.
3. Losing 10 pounds is harder than gaining it or getting 2 undergraduate degrees and a masters. Fit-monsters preach the theory that it's easy- calories in versus out. The mass-energy equivalence formula also seems pretty simple; I'm betting once you get into it, it's a doozy.
4. The world is full of perfect human beings - it's just impossible to meet them in person. Like the Trojan Horse virus, they seem to enjoy lurking on the Internet.
5. I really like Weight Watchers fajitas.
6. I'm definitely more intellectual than physical. Based on some impressions I've recently experienced, that may be a good thing.
7. I need to wash my face immediately after exercising or I'll break out like a 13 year old even though I'm 31.
8. Tough love is beneficial when it doesn't feel like berating.
9. I can still rock out to Prince like it's 1999.
10. Even if a garlic meal is eaten days before exercising, it will seep like lava out of the pores of the body during a workout (hint-hint gymsies).
11. I work too much and spend too little time taking care of myself.
12. Lots of people never stop using the "bully lingo" they learned in school (maybe because it's like so totally awesome).
13. The saying that people don't change should never change. Changing is difficult and time consuming, so it better be worth it. I've accepted that my husband will never break the habit of balling up his socks before throwing them in the hamper.
14. Even fit and healthy people are insecure and unhappy with themselves.
15. I sweat a lot. No, a lot.
16. My beliefs about humanity aren't wrong. Most people have good hearts and kind words - they just don't constantly yell them.
17. Eating healthy is more expensive than eating bad-for-you fare. Mind your opinions; it just is. Have you ever seen a buy one, get one apple deal?
18. Spandex is a really unflattering fabric regardless of shape or size. It also make you sweat in just the right spots if you exercise in a thong. Sweat underwear = not as sexy as some women may believe.
19. It is easier to be judgmental than to be supportive of something with which you disagree or can't understand.
20. Feeling sore after the gym is better than a sore conscious due to guilt.
Posts
38 comments:
I started reading these posts because I went through the same thing. I was overweight growing up and fluctuated through adulthood. Three years ago I decided to lose 50 years and I did. I managed to keep it off. I watched what ate and I tried to burn an extra 1000 calories per day at the gym. It really is that simple. The more I read these posts the more I realize we have nothing in common. Stop complaining about "meanies" and get the job done. Most of these people aren't attacking you but instead they have probably all gone through the same thing and know that at this point you aren't serious about making changes.
That was a wasted 5 minutes!
A good chunk of your observations seem like they are targeted toward the people who have responded to your blog and you did not like their responses. I'm not sure what you expected but I can't believe you expected everyone to pat you on the back and tell you how great you were doing all the time....especially if you weren't. Did you not try out for the Biggest Loser tv show? Did you think Bob and Jillian were going to coddle you along during that process? You know what they do and it's not always pretty. What I see happening a lot in this country anymore (and I'm sure you see it as a school teacher) is that people don't want to be responsibility for their actions. It's always someone or something elses fault. On that TV show the trainers always get to the source of why their trainees overeat and don't exercise. Then they are able to overcome and lose the weight. They take responsibility for their fitness from that point. You might try getting to your source of why you are where you are so that you can move forward. Quit worrying about what people say and just get the job done. There's some motivation right there. Show the blog reading community that you can do this. I think that's really what most readers would like to see anyway. Most people on the Biggest Loser lose weight and then put it back on. If you can lose the weight and keep it off you will not only have a personal victory but a public one also.
Challenge to my fellow supporters, ignore the negative leaning comments. Let's not engage them at all. No references to their comments, they do not exist...Nice post Melissa :) Another nice weekend, let's get out and get active!
BTW, the garlic one is spot on.
Honestly, you have a really bad attitude about making yourself healthier. I have been there. Hated exercise, the gym, sweating and healthy food.
It's really hard, but our society makes it really easy to be unhealthy and it is a fight to be healthy. You've got to find what works for you and keep pushing. Expensive fruit & veggies? Buy what is in season. Trader Joes has giant sacks of citrus for less than a bag of potato chips. Sweat to much at the gym? Try some places like Title Nine who offer a range of fitness clothing in a wide range of sizes that are cute, not spandex and made of great materials. Face breaking out? Find a better face cleanser.
Truly- with time, if you keep at- go back when you slip up, keep at it. Just keep trying. One morning you'll wake up and realize that the bowl of oatmeal with yogurt makes you feel great and the sausage biscuit you had the other day left you feeling like crap. One piece of pizza will have you feeling full and satisfied. You'll look forward to fruit season. You'll actually MISS the workout when you can't get there. You'll actually enjoy your workouts. You'll notice that the running skirt you bought makes your butt look perky.
And you'll just feel better and wonder why it took you so long to change. Your body will feel better. You'll have more energy.
So yes, bad habits are hard to break, particularly when in this nation we only seem to see two extremes- the sedentary junk food junky or the humorless fit guy who never misses a strenuous workout and lives on protein powder and eggwhites. You'll find your balance and be better for it.
Yet another whiny list of all the reasons you don't want to be healthy and fit.
No, it doesn't take a long time to lose 10 pounds if you are committed to it. In fact, it takes almost no time to lose that first ten. All you have to do is look at your blog entries to understand why it took so long.
Look, we understand you are intimidated by the gym. But, here's a newsflash, everyone sweats. And, lycra looks absolutely awesome on many people, my wife, for one, even after she sweats from a 7 mile run.
Eating healthy costs more? That's a load of crap. A cup of water is basically free. How much is a soda or sweet tea? Most proteins go on huge sales weekly at stores. In season fruits and veggies are heavily discounted and canned and frozen veggies are heavily discounted often. Rice and beans are the cheapest items in the store. Maybe you need to learn to shop smart.
You wanted to be on The Biggest Loser and you post on a newpaper website. And, then you whine about people who tell it like it is with weight loss? C'mon, get real.
You obviously have major hang-ups with fit people and cannot get past basic hurdles in regards to health and fitness. Stop whining and get moving!
You've taken a very weird and defensive tone in your blog. I don't think you anticipated the reaction to your weight loss quest, especially when you had your set backs. I have been reading your blog and I don't feel you are serious about weight loss but really just wanted a public forum to showcase your writing ability. The way you last out at people who are telling you how they have been successful is wrong. Instead of putting up more and more walls between you and a healthy life, examine what is making your life unhealthy and tear walls down. Lashing out at others won't take your weight off.
In the past few weeks you have posted two lists, totaling 75 reasons why you don't want to lose weight. Have you ever considered making a list of all the great things that will come your way if/when you lose the weight?
Don't let people tell you that calories in = calories out. Only people that flunked Physiology and Biochemistry believe this.
100 calories of protein is broken down in the body differently than 100 calories of carbs.
1. The body converts everything you eat into simple sugars and then burns them for fuel.
2. It takes energy to make this conversion.
3. Carbs are easily converted, Proteins are much harder to convert.
4. 100 calories of protein might take 50 calories of energy to convert to fuel for the body, leaving 50 calories for the body to burn or store.
100 calories of carbs might take 10 calories of energy to convert to fuel, leaving 75 calories to burn or store.
I agree that calories in = calories out is very basic and certainly flawed. However, for someone morbidly obese, like the blogger, this is probably a fairly decent basic notion to get her started. After she refines her fitness and diet routine she can certainly assume more accurate diet calculations. But, for someone who has clearly overconsumed for decades you have to start at the ground floor.
This is not a list of excuses or attacks; it's simply stuff that I've observed/learned through this process. I've been exercising at least 3 times per week and working on my diet. I'm focusing on making this a lifestyle overhaul and I'm continuing to make progress. In fact, I finally made it under the 10 pound mark. While I respect that others see my progress as "not serious," I've been making serious changes. I'm sorry that some readers interpret my writing as negative - I've been having a fabulous blast!
Melissa, your blog is my favorite thing on the Observer's site right now! You inspire me and make me laugh. Keep up the good work!
Trying to change your life is hard and there are many challenges. Things that seem like they should be so simple, like making healthy food choices and working out,often are not that easy. I think some people are misinterpreting Melissa's ways of using humor and sarcasm to discuss her challenges as a lack of commitment. I know she really wants to make these changes and is working hard. This blog is the story of Melissa's journey to live a healthier lifestyle, not anyone else's. Maybe she is not doing everything perfectly but she is being honest about her struggles. This will frustrate some people who do not understand her point of view, but there are others who can relate. The only way for this blog to be genuine is if she is able to express her feelings and experiences both positive and negative. I'm not saying people shouldn't be critical at all because constructive criticism is helpful, but some people's comments just make no sense.
Anonymous 7:44 am if the blog was a waste of 5 minutes then why did you waste even more time by commenting? Just love being a hater?
Keep at it Missy! You can do it!
Love ya!
Why would you get two undergrad degrees?
While I agree with Mandy that everyone has their own personal journey to weight loss, there are some constants (I've found). Eventually, the person has to make the decision to get serious and stop the silliness. Then, it becomes a whole lot less fun and a whole lot more work. I'm not saying it is a bad thing that it is work but this blogger has an enormous amount of weight to lose and that is going to take a ton of effort.
The comedic jabs are cute but at some point the te-he thong, te-he sweaty, te-he sneaker store, te-he zits, etc comments will need be replaced with a dedication that apparently is lacking, or not being relayed to the readers.
I've known a lot of people who've lost a lot of weight and have made the decision to change their lives permanently. Every single one will tell you it was a great journey and every one will tell you that a commitment is needed and it can be grueling at times.
Well now I know why you aren't seeing more results. Three days a week of exercise is barely scratching the surface. If you want results you're going to have to get to five days a week. Four would be a bare minimum.
I agree, three days a week isn't even maintenance mode. Four hard or five moderate hard is required.
Anyone else think that some of the newly named anonymous folks on here are the same "anonymous" person? Hmmm, writing styles seem very similar...So if Melissa is as morbidly obese as y'all are so fond of saying, wouldn't the 3 days a week make a big impact on her weight loss? Maybe she is working out three, building to the 4 or five days? And she said going to the gym those days, she could be walking at home the others? I don't know Melissa, but I know her struggle, and she is going to make this happen as long as she wants it. This may be basic, but be sure you drink lots of water, sometimes we eat and we're only a thirsty dummy...
Dumb comment of the day - "...she is going to make this happen as long as she wants it."
Wanting it has absolutely nothing to do with it. Working at it is what sheds the pounds. Wanting is a wish, working is a plan.
To make it work you have to want it...if you don't want something, you don't try at any level. Hello, am I speaking to a live human being? (Yes, I engaged the butthead, cause I wanted to!) Winning...
winning tips
http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/health/6-grab-and-go-proteins-that-fill-you-up-2463582/
What I Learned Reading Melissa's Blog:
1. Anonymous Commenter = Cretin and/or Creeper
2. From reading the aforementioned Anonymous Comments, losing weight successfully also means losing your sense of humor and fun, along with your friends and any life outside of a gym. But hey, at least you're skinny and self-righteous and boring, so that counts for something, right?
3. Melissa is awesome and her writing is a joy to read. Being honest and funny is no small task. Keep it up.
@Ms. Biondi...crush on you and yes, you are winning! ;)
The next time my kids say they want something I'll just refer them to tigerblood and tell them that as long as they just want it all their dreams will come true.
I'm going to add "cretin" and "creeper" to the list of things the anonymous posters have been called (in addition to alcoholic, meth head, STD carrier, supporter of pre marital births, poor parent) when all they have done is call the blogger fat, which she has admitted.
Sounds like a plan Mr. Anonymous, I think you forgot to mention ED sufferer though? An action is the result of a desire, a want, a need, a choice that has to take place in the mind (unless a reflex) before anything happens. Who wakes up and just starts working out without the thought of it first? Or when it's raining and cold and still jogs those hard miles? If your kids want to be a doctor or a lawyer, they will have to put the effort into it, but it starts as a want. But also as kids, just wanting something makes things happen when their parents find their "want" worthy of their action to give it to them. Melissa needs to want it, and if she does, she will make all the right choices of what goes in her mouth and the exercise and energy she exerts.
I want tigerblood to stop posting worthless and incorrect health and fitness advice. Just wanting it is enough to make it happen, according to him.
Am I writing in English? Maybe anonymous had one too many yesterday for...it BEGINS as a want! Check out my links that I posted today, that includes doing...but doing is also in the mind my friend. I do hope you enjoy the nice weather this weekend and have a little fun. Don't be so uptight, if I had a piece of coal, I'd gladly ask you to make it a diamond ;) Take care!
#winning
Anonymous--you can also add "miserable" and "failure at life" to the laundry list--nothing you have written so far disproves my contentions.
You're fit. We get it. Here's a carrot for you. Now go away.
I was supposed to compete in an athletic event this weekend but I'm gonna scratch. I emailed the event director and said I wanted first place and he said that was good enough and sent me a blue ribbon. I could really get used to this wanting lifestyle.
One thing I have learned from this blog is that the fat crew is incredibly sensitive and completely unwilling to step up and take a dose of reality. You can call anyone anything in America and get away with it except for calling someone fat. You do that, be prepared for the hounds of war.
Perhaps if you stopped calling people names, they'd be a lot more willing to listen to your advice.
Not going to comment on the comments....Meliss, i thought it was a great blog. Really funny, laughed outloud. I am happy to hear you have lost some weight and r going to the gym 3 times a week. "I" think it is a big step and keep going. I am a gym a phobe and think this is big. Interested in doing a 15 K road race? You have enough time to get in the right shape for it...it is in July...think about it...it could be a great goal to look forward to. We will discuss. Also, i too can still party like it is 1999!
I cannot believe how mean spirited and vicious people can be. Melissa is trying through humor and good nature to publicly discuss her weight problem. It is not easy to be this open and honest about something that has followed her throughout her life. Try having a little compassion instead of being so judgemental.
I find it hilarious that some of these people think that "Anonymous" is the same person. They're mostly people who didn't want to take the time to give away their email address so they could sign up to post.
We know that anonymous is more than one, but "anonymous" is the same person and anyone who can't realize that is pathetic...
5 minutes well spent :)
From Doug (non anonymous)
Wow. I'm continually amazed at how condescending and nasty folks can be when they post on a blog. That doesn't mean that some of the info they provide isn't true. I'm not somebody who would open up his life to a bunch of anonymous readers, then actively ask for their feedback. I guess this is something that a blogger has to expect.
In my experience it really does get easier. Working out stops feeling like "work" and more like a normal part of your day that you would miss if it wasn't there. Eating realistic portions, and the right foods, isn't depriving yourself. It's just being healthy. Treats are fine, but in moderation.
I'm down 40 pounds over 2 years, and my wife is down 50. She joined weight watchers, now is becoming an instructor. I'm about to run my first half marathon. It really is amazing how your life can change if you just make the decision then stick with it.
Melissa, I wish you nothing but good luck with your lifestyle changes.
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