Monday, March 14, 2011

I went on a food bender...


Weekends are hard for me; I'm out of my routine and my eating tends to suffer. Sometimes I go on a food bender and can't get right until Monday. Then I feel that all my hard work and exercise during the week is ruined. I know I have to break the cycle, but I'm struggling in my attempts. Remember that "Stop the Insanity!" lady from the 90s? Yup, I'm livin' it loud and clear. That said, it's not like I just sit on the couch huffing whipped cream and licking the inside of potato chip bags. It's just that my lunches and dinners are a little bigger and a little less fat-free friendly - more Paula Deen than Rachel Ray. Being that there's a weekend every 5 days, this is starting to be an issue.


Filled with Clorox and laundry, my weekends consist of vacuuming, organizing, errand-running, and catching up. Unfortunately, they also happen to include some take-out and a low-fat fudge pop (or two). By Friday night, I'm sick of slicing vegetables and scrubbing dirty pots; healthy dishes take planning and prep time. Come Sunday morning, the guilt rolls in like a work-week fog and by Monday I'm back on the wagon, cursing my lack of will-power. This sabotage circuit is starting to get on my nerves, not to mention ruin my weight loss. But in my free time, I'm not naturally a schedule-driven person. It seems I've come across yet another bad-habit booby-trap that I need to overcome. On this journey, there seems to be no rest for the weary...or the weary just can't rest when it comes to weight loss changes.

93 comments:

Anonymous said...

Tony Schwartz; "Most of us wildly overvalue our will and discipline. Ingenious research by Roy Baumeister and others has demonstrated that our self-control is a severely limited resource that gets progressively depleted by every act of conscious self-regulation." ...
"Only 5 percent of our choices are consciously self-selected." - the other 95% is habit.

Anonymous said...

Cars don't drive themselves to take out and shopping carts don't load themselves with ice cream.

Everyone is busy these days but the weekend's are a golden opportunity to exercise, not gorge. Get up early Sat and Sun and go for a long run/walk and then you are done.

If somehow you can't cook on the weekend, make an extra portion of whatever you cook on Weds and Thurs. Do not get take out, ever.

Our family lets it all go on Saturday night. But, we also each exercise 1-2 hours on Sat and Sun.

Once you make diet and exercise a habit, it is very hard to continue to make overeating a habit.

Anonymous said...

You're not alone!

I had an a-ha moment on Sunday when I realized that for every "bad" decision I make I have to make 3-4 "good" ones to make up for the damage.

People who don't have weight issues can't fully understand how much of the battle is in our heads.

Anonymous said...

Here's what you do. (This is coming from someone who has lost a lot of weight several times and who has managed to keep it off this last time for 3+ years now.) Pick one meal that you are going to cheat at, like Saturday night. During that one meal, eat and drink anything you want. Look forward to that meal all week and enjoy it. But the rest of the time stick to your diet 100%. If you don't feel like cooking on the weekends, pick up some low-calorie frozen meals. I refuse to cook on the weekends as well, but I am able to stick to my diet except for my one cheat meal. Try it. It really does work. Good luck!!

Jodie said...

Melissa, If hubby isn't home, call a friend for support. We can go on a long walk on weekend mornings. Nothing better than combining catching up with friends and working out.

Also, plan to do your workouts on the weekends too. You will have more energy to get all those errands done and you will feel so good at accomplishing the work out that hopefully you won't get derailed.

Stay busy, and always have some backup meals in the freezer for those days you don't want (or don't have time) to cook.

Stay focused on the prize! A healthier Melissa, plus a new outfit for the wedding in October.

Anonymous said...

Another Monday, another "I blew it this weekend and am going to get serious this week" blog entry.

Unknown said...

I understand about having a little cheat on the weekends (to me that helps keep you on track a little better), but gorging on bad stuff is not so good. Even if you are tired and you do not want to cook your own food, there are plenty of restaurants that can cook your meal in a healthy manner. grilled chicken, fish, or even a small steak is sooo much healthier than any fast food quick meal anyway. Couple that with a healthy garden salad (dressing to the side) and you should not be doing a whole lot of damage to your diet. And again, keep remembering what your goal is. Put reminders on your refrigerator and cabinets to help keep you focused. One last tip, if you eat out and you get something that is not exactly healthy, cut the meal in half and ask the waiter to bring you a doggie bag right away. Put half of your meal in the doggie bag and then put it under your chair. That way you only eat half and don't overindulge!!!!! Your health is a long term investment and the only person you are doing damage to when you eat badly and get off track is yourself. Good luck and keep at it. Weight loss is not an easy journey, but it can be done!!!!!

DG

Anonymous said...

Pathetic. And you're a teacher? What a great example you are to our youth. You don't want it. Face it, you don't want it! Until you do you will continue in the destructive cycle. Eating out? Are you kidding me? You should only eat out once a week. Twice at most. Your lame excuses are indicative of what's wrong in our society. Take responsibility for your life and get with the program.

Anonymous said...

What kind of bothers me about your blog is that you are a teacher. As a teacher your health care is funded by us, the taxpayers. So, in essence I am paying for you to be fat and the myriad of complications that will arise.

And, I'm also a Y member. While I believe strongly in the Y's mission to not let the price prevent anyone from joining, it does bother me somewhat that you are asking me to fund your membership, and, at the same time you blog about how often you decide to indulge. It needs to be a quid pro quo - I give, you give.

Anonymous said...

People make their own choices. You control what you put in your mouth. Maybe you should skip the dieting and go straight for gastric-by pass surgery. Then you might stand a chance.

Anonymous said...

Wow, some harsh comments on here today. When I retired and was not as active (my job involved lots of walking) I began to put on the lbs. Then I quit smoking 2 years ago and food took the place of cigarettes. Now I am paying for all that ice cream, pretzels, and other goodies I consumed. I still would not start smoking again for anything but I have embarked on a 45 minute-a-day walk and traded the goodies for healthier food and smaller portions. It is coming off slowly but surely. And it's so much harder to lose when you are older. Hang in there, Melissa. You will make it.

Melissa M. Sykes said...

I used to believe that people were genuinely good at heart and supportive of others. Now I realize it's all a facade to seem socially appropriate. Under the safety of anonymity, people will be true to their black hearts and hurtful demons. No matter how much weight I lose or gain, I will never base a person's worth or role model status on what they look like. And by the way, I work to earn my salary and health care - and I deserve a raise. What are you doing to change the future?

Anonymous said...

You can continue to make excuses and accuse people of being demons. But, none of that excuses your lack of personal responsibility in becoming obese.

What have I done to change the future? I have made health and fitness a priority in my life so that I can grow old and be with my family and friends. That's plenty for me.

tigerblood said...

At least you are honest, it would be so much easier to "cheat" on this blog than it is in your diet, but you though may not seem serious to some, are doing the best you can do at the moment to reach your goals. Quite frankly, it is my opinion that you aren't fully ready to take this challenge on. I think you will get there, but if this were another reality tv competition, I would recommend that you keep working at it, but try again next year. So many habits need to change and more behind the scenes work needs to be done. I am the first one that supported you and believed in your ability to make this happen.

Anonymous said...

IGNORE THE HATERS. They want to see you fail so they'll have something other than their own miserable lives to laugh at.

You're doing fine! Just keep the pace and u-turn if you get off track.

Anonymous said...

I recognize weight loss is hard. But I work and pay for my own health care and the implications of being overweight, let alone having a weight related illness such as diabetes has a significant impact on the ability to afford insurance let alone get it when you buy your own. Honestly- when knowing that getting diabetes, weighing too much, having high blood pressure, a bad knee or back will make your premium unaffordable you do think twice about what you eat and make time to exercise.
There is a serious cost to a consistent deprioritizing of your weight and fitness. Most americans that are covered by employer care don't have to think about it.

Anonymous said...

I know how hard it is to lose weight. I've done so several times but always gained it back. But not this time. I had to really, really want this. I finally had to get angry at myself--angry at all my bad food choices and angry because of the way I looked--to really decide to change my life. And I suspect you are not angry enough at yourself yet. I would, like you, start a diet and then go off of it a few days later. But this time, something is different. I am determined NEVER to look like my fat self again! I have lost 25 pounds and am never going back. I have 20 more pounds to go and am 100 percent positive I will lose it. Just don't give up. And get mad at yourself! That's your motivation, at least it was for me. Good luck!

tigerblood said...

Nice comment anonymous 2:59...and to those that think the easy way out is bariatric surgery, you are nothing but simple minded fools who would think that storing money in your mattress will make you rich!

Anonymous said...

“A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them and strong enough to correct them.”

You got this! Keep your head up and keep on pushing!Don't even worry about the ppl on here that hide and talk down to you! I know you are strong...
:)

-DWE

guiltfree said...

To the insurance agent posting today, it has been said before, please be sure you aren't doing anything in your personal/professional life that could cause a raise in your premiums. Please don't smoke, do drugs, drink too much, fornicate, sustain an injury during exercise etc, etc...This PSA has been brought you by KMA...thank you and STFU

Anonymous said...

When you decide to get really serious about weight loss this blog will look a lot different. Until then I suspect we will continue to read endless posts about excuse making, weekend binges, and how fit people speak different languages.

I you decide to join a fitness group you will immediately discover everyone is just as busy as you, has just as many obligations, and has put excuse making in the rear view mirror.

manicmonday said...

How much time is left on this blog? Not an ugly question, just curious.

Anonymous said...

Guiltfree needs to change his/her name to Freeofeducation. Here are the leading causes of death in the USA (from the CDC) for 2010:

Heart disease: 616,067
Cancer: 562,875
Stroke (cerebrovascular diseases): 135,952
Chronic lower respiratory diseases: 127,924
Accidents (unintentional injuries): 123,706
Alzheimer's disease: 74,632
Diabetes: 71,382
Influenza and Pneumonia: 52,717
Nephritis, nephrotic syndrome, and nephrosis: 46,448
Septicemia: 34,828

Take a good hard look at that list. Well over 50% of the deaths in the US have a direct correlation to obesity, which is 100% avoidable. Why would anyone voluntarily do this to themselves?

Tainted Fibers said...

Keep on trying Melissa. I gotta wonder how many of us would be willing to open our lives up to the public. Not me. People are cruel, vindictive and self-righteous. Most likely were I in your position, I would never be as gracious.

Good luck to you. People, you need to get over your attitudes.

guiltfree said...

Other than acts of God, everything can be avoided by choice. And I thought smoking was a cause of at least a couple of those on the list. It always tickles me to see the very fit folk refuse a steak or milk but puff away on a cig...too cute!

guiltfree said...

@anonymous 3:46 please give yourself a fake name like the rest of us. How about anallyretentive? Or wizardofoz, because you like to hide behind your stats and facts to justify yourself being an a--hole. No one wants to be fat, no one wants to die early or be in physical pain, but as easy as it sounds to put the fork down, some people need more help than just willpower.

tigerblood said...

still winning...

@ Melissa, I am a supporter, didn't realize that all of my post didn't make it through earlier, but just want to say that I know you can do it! Push through the self-doubt, and allow yourself to self-deny.

Anonymous said...

An obese person will have an average of $8,315 in medical bills a year in 2018 compared with $5,855 for an adult at a healthy weight. That's a difference of $2,460.

If the percentage of obese adults doesn't change but stays at the current rate of 34%, then excess weight will cost the nation about $198 billion by 2018.

The obese are more likely to be depressed, to miss school or work, to feel suicidal, to earn less, and to find it difficult to marry. And their health care costs a lot. Obese Americans spend about 42 percent more than healthy-weight people on medical care each year. Improper weight and diet strongly correlate with chronic diseases, which account for three-fourths of all health-care spending.

Kristen M said...

This is going to be a 3 part message...hold on to your pants ladies and gentlemen! LOL

I am appalled that anyone would have the audacity to ever suggest to ANY individual to give up on obtaining their goals....yet alone to actually go under the knife and take on a surgery with a high mortality risk. SHAME ON YOU!

I can't imagine if you had a child or loved one experiencing these struggles, that you would ever promote such an unsafe risk. NO...instead you would do all you can to encourage weight loss through natural means, so that you may keep your loved ones here with you longer. And when they do struggle, you have serious delusions to believe that you would then negatively criticize and berate them to the degree that you have attempted to break down Melissa. The moment you see the hurt in your child or loved ones eyes that you have inflicted with your words, you would break your own heart. Well guess what, that is what you are doing to an innocent individual. Again I say SHAME ON YOU!

guiltfree said...

easy...have all the fatties marry one another, and if they all die off, your world would be better now, wouldn't it anonymous? By the way, sometimes #s lie and don't tell the full story, if you believe otherwise, I have some nice bridges I could sell you, and if you promise to jump off I'll even let you have one at a discount!

Kristen M said...

As for Melissa being a teacher…I applaud her all the way for being truthful in her struggles. I think for her students, it would help them to see that even an adult has struggles through life. I think this prepares them to realize you will always make mistakes through life, and that acknowledging those mistakes along the way are how you learn, and correct, to get yourself on track to the life you believe you deserve. Those who are pointing fingers at her for being honest with her students, are likely the same individuals who never discus sex, alcohol, or drugs with their children and take the risk of their child binge drinking, becoming addicts, contracting STDs or even end up raising their teenager’s baby! Knowledge is power!

Kristen M...long letter done! said...

Do not fault someone for having the guts to be truthful, and opening themselves up to the public’s eyes with their own mistakes taking the spot light. This is an extremely brave act she is taking upon herself….and it has helped me. Even if I am just one person…I count! Melissa….you have made a significant difference in my life…and I could never being to truly express how thankful I am for that!

And by the way…I have absolutely no fear of the backlash of comments to come, anonymous I will not be….bring it on you closed minded suckers…

tigerblood said...

Kristen M is winning...love it!

Anonymous said...

Crush on Kristen M ;)

Anonymous said...

The Jared/Subway diet consisted of two foot long subs. The real deal with his diet was the fact that he walked 3 miles to subway, ate, then walked three miles home. Using the same distance you could do the Pizza Hut, Five Guys, or McDonald's Diet.

As for the Stop the Insanity woman, Susan Powter was a fraud. She claimed to have lost a large amount of weight, when she actually was never over weight, and used fake photos in order pedal her books and taps.

Take a 30 min walk in the morning or after work. Try hiking on the weekends, and cut back on the bad stuff, but at the end of the day, be happy with who you are.

Anonymous said...

Kristen M - interesting, although seriously flawed rant. So, those of us who are fit and a healthy weight somehow missed being educated on drinking, addiction, STDs and our kids will have children out of wedlock? That's just flat out weird.

I take the view that to live the healthy life requires a great deal more reality and honesty than living "la vida gorda." No one gets morbidly obese by being honest with themselves. Instead they make excuses and lie to themselves. But, the bell always tolls, always.

I do applaud the blogger for making the decision to chronicle her alleged journey to health and fitness. I think we all knew there would be bumps in the road. But, at this point there is no road, just bumps.

guiltfree said...

Once again, anonyMOUSE reads things his way...she wasn't saying all fit people, she just implied and could be correctly, that those obsessed with fitness sometimes don't use that same focus on other aspects of their lives. Melissa overeats, she doesn't exercise, but this isn't what defines her. She is a person, with feelings, with emotions, with a career that is more rewarding than anything we could possibly do, nor would really want to if we are honest about the lack of pay and respect. She needs to get her things right in her life, and seeing that she isn't one dimensional, I do know that she can do it. Don't escape to the fridge or the gym, face reality and make the right choices. No one wants to live a life on the run from reality...

Anonymous said...

While I'm not sure that the words chosen by some to express their frustration with Melissa's diet are totally "appropriate" (whatever appropriate is), I can certainly see their points of view. Similarly, I can see the points of view of those who stick up for her constantly. The truth is, both sides are right to some extent. I appreciate that Melissa is honest about her struggles because losing weight is hard, harder for some than others, but like others, sometimes it's difficult to keep the cheering up when it doesn't seem like the person is really committed to it. That being said, I'm the one who chooses to keep reading, so I only have myself to blame for the frustration I feel when I see the choices she should make so clearly and she just isn't making them. Making excuses is SO easy, but everyone has their issues and has to fight to overcome them, be they time, finances, whatever the issue. Supporting someone and enabling their set-backs are two totally separate things. Tough love!

guiltfree said...

Observer staff, please recruit anonymous to submit himself to a blog as well detailing what it takes to make weightloss happen! It's about time he show his face, we all know he knows how to show his ass...

RNY4ever said...

Kristen M said... "yet alone to actually go under the knife and take on a surgery with a high mortality risk."

Exactly what surgery are you talking about? Gastric Bypass surgery is a successful tool to lose weight. It may not be everyone's answer to weight loss but it can be a viable option. Its a big decision to make, and it is most definately not the easy way out. Get your facts straight before spouting off about a high mortality rate.

Anonymous said...

To Mr. or Mrs. Blog Stalker-

You should start a blog on the Biggest Loser stalkers. You must have this post set to update on your phone whenever a new comment comes in. Get a LIFE and a heart. If you don't like what you're reading, look elsewhere. I bet you have a little wiener.

And by the way, making health and fitness a priority in YOUR life has no positive effect on society - especially when you need to put down others to make yourself feel superior. Melissa is indicative of what's wrong in our society? How about all the self-important superficial society who focus on nothing but their own wants and needs? Way to contribute to your fellow man. Grow one.

Anonymous said...

To Anonymous 3:49:
I am also a teacher and if you are paying for my health care, I would like to say a few words...you pay for shit!! Teachers are the most overworked profession, where we get overlooked all the time for our hard work. I give props to Sykes for showing kids what an awesome writer she is, and how she is a role model in other ways. You are what's wrong with parents now a days, we need role models for self respect and honesty, not about what you look like! Ignore all the negative comments Sykes, you're doing amazing!!

Anonymous said...

Most overworked? Most in corp American work 70+ hours a week 12 months a year. And, yes, my tax dollars pay your salary and benefit. If you went into the profession thinking you'd get rich, you are a fool and have no business teaching my kids.

Don't get me started on your ludicrously generous taxpayer funded retirement.

Anonymous said...

To the whiny teacher - get out of the profession. You are what is wrong with teachers. You don't like the pay, the hours, the kids THEN LEAVE AND STOP WHINING.

guiltfree said...

70+ hrs a week? Hmmm, is he counting business meetings at the strip club? I work and have worked for fortune 500 companies, and most people that get paid what a teacher gets paid barely work a 40 hr week...and those of you who think teachers sit on their ass on their summer don't have their facts and stats straight!

holy monkey said...

As a teacher, I knew I wouldn't get paid next to nothing, but that is not the point! I'm pretty sure I also pay for my health insurance. I think it's funny that you think a teacher has it easy, it only means you have no idea. I am blown away by the negativity of people...what is wrong with you...be positive and supportive of others..I hope my daughter's generation is a lot more open to compassion and less on judgment of others!!

guiltfree said...

I still can't get passed the 70+ hour comment...that's an average of 10 hour days for each day of the week? or 14 hour days for 5 days, so at that rate, if one works out two hours a day, that leaves about eight hrs to do everything else including sleep? And if this is actually the case, that exec makes more than six figures, so there in itself shoots down the theory that teachers are overpaid!

sensgirl said...

Have you tried Weight Watchers? It's not a diet, it's a lifestyle. I too have tried everything, lost and gained, it's not easy. It's almost an addition like acoholism, etc. I started Weight Watchers and in 3 weeks lost 8 1/2 pounds, but even more so I am not deprived. You can almost eat what you want - it's about portion control and facing someone with a scale once a week.

tigerblood said...

sensgirl is winning...

Anonymous said...

One thing is really obvious. That being, teachers have absolutely no clue how much people in the private sector pay for health care.

guiltfree said...

And maybe non teachers have no idea what its like to be disrespected inside the classroom and out, by students, parents, administration and bloggers who think they have it made and easy. You want teacher's "cheap" "easy" healthcare, become one...for the record, no one was whining or showing regret about being a teacher, so please re-read what you think you read. (And no, I am not a teacher, just happen to relate to hardworking individuals)

Anonymous said...

I concur on the Weight Watchers comment. I went on their on-line program 4 weeks ago with a 20 pound goal. The first week I lost 6 pounds and now 1 pound a week since. The point system emphasizes healthy eating and portion control. It also adjusts based on my 5X/week running training. I was skeptical at first but really like it now.

Oh, and my husband and I both work for corp America. 70 hour work weeks are very very common, especially when you factor in travel.

guiltfree said...

And I am sure you are paid accordingly...hence, my reference to workers that make what an average teacher makes. Should teachers count their commute, or when they have to shop for their class or all the homework and papers they need to grade? What about all the courses and classes they have to take? I'm just blown away by those that try to dismiss what a teacher does or chastises them as whiners or complainers. This isn't NY where the unions make sure the teachers get paid like execs and don't even have to be in the classroom.

Anonymous said...

How many think that ANONYMOUS has a secret crush going on? Why else would he repeatedly return to this one blog if it is truly so bad?

Come on, ANONYMOUS, you can come out into the light. We won't bite or blast you like you've blasted others.

Hint. Walk towards the light.

Anonymous said...

"Melissa M. Sykes said...I used to believe that people were genuinely good at heart and supportive of others. Now I realize it's all a facade to seem socially appropriate. Under the safety of anonymity, people will be true to their black hearts and hurtful demons."
_________
I agree. The internet has revealed what people are truly and probably have always been thinking.

That being said, I don't think I'll ever understand how someone could get to be so heavy to being with. I'm almost 50 and have eaten well, and exercised routinely since I was a teenager. I have gained a few pounds the last few years, but am still within the "normal" range. Eat normal portions, stay away from so much fast or processed foods, and exercise regularly. It is indeed a lifestyle, and not a temporary goal. You have to make it a priority.

If Only She Had Applied Herself said...

I come from a long line of fat people. I was also one of them for a while. Twenty years ago I decided to break ranks and lose the excess weight. I did it, and I have kept it off successfully since then. Here's a secret though: it's hard as hell. Every meal is a decision. Every day is a battle between sitting on the couch and running on the street. It makes me mad that I don't get to sit down at a restarurant and order whatever I want. I feel like smacking every skinny person eating Doritos and chugging beer.

But...whatever. We all have our struggles, and mine is keeping my weight in check. I am thankful because I know there are scores of people in this world who would be happy if their only crisis each day is deciding between a bagel and a doughnut. You can do this, Melissa. If I can, you can.

On a side note: I have been blogging for two years now, and the first thing you have to do is grow a thick skin. Folks are more than willing to shoot barbs from behind the safety of a computer screen. :-)

Anonymous said...

The teacher argument has gotten really old. This is the profession you have chosen. If you are truly in it because you want to change lives of young people, you have to accept that there are going to be rude ones, lazy ones, and downright horrible ones. But you are choosing to "change their lives" on a daily basis. No one is condemning you for this, just stating that you chose it. If you are unhappy leave it. I chose to work in non-profits because I love it and because I want to change lives. I've had bad bosses, I've dealt with rude personalities, I pay for my own healthcare, and I make less than the starting salary of a teacher and I've been in it for 5 years, with performance-based raises each year. But I CHOSE it. If you continually focus on how down-trodden teachers are, you are only going to continue to be miserable about it, and that doesn't help change the lives of kids for the better. They know when your heart's not in it.
Now back to the point at hand, every professional, no matter what job they have, can use the excuse that they don't have enough time to diet and exercise. You make time, and if you are unwilling to do it, you will not succeed.

Anonymous said...

We all have things that make weightloss and fitness and eating right difficult. (Unless, I don't know, you work at a gym). Figure out what needs to be healthier and get the changes made. If you can be healthy and exercise all week with the responsibilities of your classroom, on the weekend it should be easier. Find enjoyable exercise- try canoeing, hiking, taking a bike ride... that makes burning calories a treat on the weekend.
I was once 300 lbs. I hated walking. Yes, I hated walking. Around the block. 10 years later I completed a marathon. 10 years later, going for a run on the greenway on a pretty day is a treat. Taking my dog for an hour walk is so nice it doesn't even register as exercise in my book.
You can change and make fitness something to look forward to.

Andrea said...

WOW!! People are rotten!! you must have nothing better to do then insult, be rude and ignorant!!!!!!!!!! 1st of all how dare you suggest surgery, do u even know how serious it is and how many complications there may be from the surgery??? Probably not thats why you suggested it!! Melis, dont listen to these neagtive people they probably have nothing better in their lifes b to than sit on the computer all day, they are the ones with sad and sorry lifes. Stick with it and you can do it!!! You are fabulous always remember it!!

KMAL said...

For the record, a friend of mine who covers his entire family on his teacher insurance pays over $500/month to do so. Now, I don't know how that compares to other professions, but I would imagine that not many professionals with a Master's Degree pay that much for insurance.

...and what is with "anonymous" posting fifteen times a day? What a sad, lonely life you must lead.

Jackie P said...

Wow, well I left a comment yesterday but it was too long. Then I struggled with a lot of anger over the heartless and mean spirited things some people were saying. It got to the point that even people with constructive criticisms were making me angry. Now however I just have this to say to you Miss: DO NOT let a horrible person hiding behind the computer derail what you are doing!! You have made positive progress, and I don't care how slow you do it, or how often you misstep all that matters is the positive progress. No one has the right to devalue that, or you. Remember we are here for you and love you!!

Anonymous said...

You realize that anyone can post as anonymous, right? It's not just the same person over and over. Watch...

Anonymous said...

As one of the anonymous posters I can assure you they aren't all from me.

Gina said...

I don't understand why people have to be so negative and cruel with their comments. If you are not enjoying the blog, then JUST DON'T READ IT!! How luck you must be to be able to look in the mirror and see perfection. The blogger has lost 10 pounds and has not lost her ability to put her flaws and mistakes out there for people like you to tear down. As far as being a poor example, I happen to know the blogger, and you will NEVER achieve, accomplish, or be half the human being that this woman is. Why don't you just read about yourself and maybe you won't need to chastise another person.

guiltfree said...

Some people just want to see results rather than the internal conflict that Melissa and others trying to lose weight deal with. The truth is that for some it's easy to keep weight off or maintain a normal weight, while for others it's not that simple. She is trying, maybe not as hard as she could, but she knows that, and doesn't need the name calling or put downs. Either way, she has to answer to herself and her own words that can be read from all her previous blogs.

Anonymous said...

While you know the blogger, Gina, you most likely don't know many of the others posting, so you have no clue if they have achieved half as much or twice as much as Melissa. The point people are trying to make is that losing weight is hard, and you have to be willing to give up some stuff and make serious changes. She wants to lose weight but continues to blog about how she doesn't want to do this and she can't sacrifice that and she's so busy she doesn't have time. Everyone's busy! Everyone's short on time. Less excuses and more effort. She's even said making excuses is her strength, so people are giving her alternatives to making those excuses, but people think they're just being mean. You don't succeed by being coddled everywhere you go. I'm sure she had to work to get a degree. I'm sure she has to work to get a paycheck. Same concept. You have to work to be healthy!

guiltfree said...

And another thing...for those that do insult her or want to hurt her feelings, do you treat those that you consider friends in a similar manner when they struggle? What is is that allows one to disrespect a stranger? Are Melissa's tactics working? Probably not as much as she'd even want to, so she needs to reflect and try again, and again until the right fit happens. I like my sweets, my treats, my fatty fried foods, but there isn't anything more delicious than trying on your clothes and them being looser than before! Self-motivation is but one of the keys....

guiltfree said...

@anonymous 2PM, if you are the same anonymous as always, that by far has to be the most coherent and on the money post you've done. I didn't detect any hatred, anger, or rudeness at all...if this is you, and you mean what you say, excellent illustration about how Melissa is capable of hard work and determination, she just needs to apply this to a healthier lifestyle. So maybe she does need to treat this like a college course with alotted study times? Good luck teach! :)

Anonymous said...

Last Saturday as I drove uptown at 8:30 am or so I drove opposite the half marathon for about 5 miles. The first runners were you typical incredible in shape men and women. But, 4-5 miles later were the average runners. None of them were making excuses. They were out there changing their lives. That's inspiration.

Jackie P said...

Anonymous 2pm: If people were just giving her alternatives to her missteps that would be one thing. However some of these people have taken it to an unconscionable level. Telling her that she shouldn't be allowed to be a teacher because she is a horrible example to her students and things like that is just beyond evil. Everyone makes excuses, she's just talking about them and being honest about them. Obviously she has made some good choices she's lost weight. If she highlighted only the good things she has done none of this would be happening, but then again we wouldn't know what she is really going through. Those of us who support her with encouragement aren't trying to enable her, we're just trying to counteract the haters who would try to break her. Telling her to just give up like one anonymean is NOT constructive at all!!

Anonymous said...

Jackie P - many people find obesity to be unconscionable.

tigerblood said...

So true Jackie P...you are winning!

mranonymousblows said...

Go ahead anonymous...do it

http://www.aolhealth.com/2010/10/04/thinner-men-more-likely-to-commit-suicide/

guiltfree said...

No extreme is good, those that eat with gluttony, or those that starve themselves, or obsess with exercise all equate to issues within the inner being...be the sum of all your deeds, thoughts, wants, not just one.

Anonymous said...

I'll take my chances being fit and healthy with a slightly higher chance of suicide over a life of diabetes, heart disease, stroke, coronary artery disease, joint issues, etc.

Here's two little stats for you to chew on:

Extremely obese people — those who are 80 or more pounds over a normal weight — live three to 12 fewer years than their normal-weight peers, a new study shows.

Overall, excess weight was responsible for the loss of roughly 95 million years of life in the USA in 2008.

Kind of makes a 12% increase in the likelihood of suicide in men in Sweden seem rather insignificant.

Stats - liar's paradise.

guiltfree said...

"Stats liars paradise" about the only thing anonymous says that's right!

tigerblood said...

I hope anonymous 4:22 is pro-life with all the millions of years of life that he is concerned with...

Anonymous said...

ayayay

Anonymous said...

Melissa, how does your husband/family fit into your plan to get healthier? Are they supportive or do they sometimes/often encourage indulging when you should be making good decisions. Just curious as to how they might be helping/hurting your plans. I remember you talking about how you didn't want to exercise because it took time away from them. I would love to hear if you've figured out a way to make this a family-friendly plan so you are exercising and eating healthy along with the rest of your family.

Anonymous said...

I love how people say that weight loss is hard. It's hard if you take in more calories than you burn. This is not rocket science. You either choose to live or you choose to shorten your life. This blogger is not serious about weight loss or becoming healthy. She might just be enjoying the attention, albeit somewhat negative. When you get to the point that these people are, yes, shedding the pounds requires more effort. But once you get going and slowly increase your level of effort, the weight starts coming off at a more noticeable rate. Then it becomes more rewarding and the weight loss can snowball. But unless you reconcile in your mind a motivation to do so...it's just not going to happen. And right now....it ain't really happening. I also hear about denying onesself. If you get adequate exercise you don't have to deny yourself. You can't overindulge, but you don't have to deny yourself or you will drive yourself crazy. Should you cut out sodas? To a bare minimum. Should you cut out fried foods? Again, a bare minimum. Etc. Etc. Get off the couch (or get out from behind the computer) and get moving. You'll be glad you did.

Diana said...

To Melissa's supporters- What if we pretend that the negative (and rather creepy) posts from anonymous aren't there? It looks like most of the negativity stems from this guy (I don't think it's a woman), getting some kind of high from seeing how mean he can be as each supportive post comes back. I think his negative posts should just be drowned in direct support, acting like he's not even there. I don't think he'll go away, but at least he won't grow more offensive. We hope : ) Good luck Melis!

Anonymous said...

Again with the anonymous thing. You realize that anonymous can be more than one person. Anyone can post as anonymous. Allow me to demonstrate. I have an account, however, I am going to click the little anonymous button below. Also, if you just type in a name, it's the same as being anonymous because it gives no indication of who you are.
Y'all are cracking me up and simultaneously hurting my head thinking this "anonymous" is some guy out to get everyone with his or her comments.

Jessica said...

Melissa,

A few suggestions:

I sit down for about 30 minutes on Sunday and decide my meals for the week and my coordinating grocery list. I head to the grocery store and get home and get cooking. Don't forget the power of the crock pot! You can make easy, healthy meals on Thursday night while you sleep and have plenty for the weekend. Use the internet as your best recipe tool! I find all kinds of great recipes and modify them to my liking. It's really easy to find yourself thinking it's "easier/quicker" to get take out...but is it really? You have to order, wait on it, go fetch it, pay for it (don't forget that gas you're burning in your car!) Think of what you are going to order from your favorite restaurant and figure out how to make it at home. It's a mind game, you really can beat it!

tigerblood said...

Jessica wins post of the week...winning indeed!

and yes, anyone can post anonymous, but it does seem that there is one gentleman in particular that has the majority of the anonymous posts. For instance, my name isn't tigerblood, it's just my blood type. Enjoy...

Kristen M said...

2 Part letter coming up!

I just would like to remind all (anonymous, named, whomever) that have posted extremely harsh and negative comments. There is a difference between constructive criticism, and being a bully.

Those who have offered constructive criticism, (i.e...Stop making excuses) I applaud you for being able to show tough love in a respectable manner. However saying things like, "many people find obesity to be unconscionable" there is nothing in this statement that is constructive. It is just flat out rude, mean, disrespectful and over all bullying.

Hide behind your stats all day long, it will not change the fact that there are deaths being caused around the world due to bullying. Be careful what you say to others, be respectful in your criticisms, no one is attempting to confine your opinion. Just remember, people do go to jail these days for being cruel. The more you break a person’s confidence, the more you break the person…mental issues are running rampant these days due to the feeding of insults from others who have no idea the weight that their voice truly carries. Please be mindful of the severity of your words.

Kristen M said...

On another note:

Melissa's choice in career or how her insurance is paid has nothing to do with her blog. This blog is about an individual's struggles of weight loss. I understand how those particular subjects were jump started by certain remarks...however; the rhetoric to follow has gone waaaay off the charts.

Can we please get back on the right topic…how to loose weight, get healthy, and stay on track! It is much more useful to read about how a weight watchers plan actually works on a daily basis and whether or not it is working for the individual posting about it. Just like, all the ideas of how to plan your week or day out appropriately in effort to stay on track, are all great tips.

We all are reading this blog for a reason, be it to loose weight, stay in shape, get fit and healthy, or even just to attempt to spread our knowledge and help others. Let’s post information that is beneficial for all to read.

tigerblood said...

Amen Kristen M! xoxo

Anonymous said...

Kristen M - you forgot another reason we read this blog. Melissa is a AWESOME writer and her posts never fail to make me laugh.
Yes, I'm biased, I'm one of her good friends, but you need to admit - regardless of your opinion on her progress on her weight loss - she's a good, entertaining writer.
Miss - thanks for writing these and spreading a little humor and joy in my day. - MN

Not Fat said...

Kristen M - if you could be a little more self righteous I'd appreciate it.

tigerblood said...

Okay, I'll admit, it may sound like I am taking up for Kristen M, but I didn't note any self-righteousness in her posts...simple, let's keep to the topic, for instance, I just now got off topic, though I did burn a few cals typing :)

tigerblood said...

http://health.yahoo.net/experts/eatthis/7-diet-food-ripoffs

Anonymous said...

Well - to all the negative people out there in blog land, if I'm only going to live 3-12 years longer by being healthy, thin and fit- then bring on the guinness, the corn beef and throw in some cake too. Just remember, it's Lent - go to church, ask for forgiveness and have a little compansion for your fellow man.

Anonymous said...

I commend Melissa for putting her life out there for all to see and having such negativity and cruelty thrown at her. What does it matter what a person looks like if they are trying to make a difference with children? Maybe if parents were doing their jobs with their children, then teachers would not have to vent to others about what they go through. Keep it up Melissa. We're with you!